What will Martini look like?

This is the most adorable picture, and one of my favorite baby pictures of AG. Unfortunately I don't have any baby pictures of myself. Yesterday I completed the SF Kaiser hospital tour and for a second it really hit home that I could give birth at anytime after week 36. I imagined being admitted in the Labor room as we walked through the process and my anxiety level increased significantly.

I had controlled many of my fears after reading Ina May's Natural Childbirth several months ago. But yesterday, when I was in the hospital, all those fears and anxiety flooded back. Could have been me seeing a new mom being wheeled out of the delivery room with all these tubes sticking out of her - and she looking so miserable. It's the needles that gives me the chills, and the fact that no matter how nice people are - the environment is still cold and sterile - like a cheap run-down apartment. I don't know how I'm supposed to relax in that environment.

I'm trying to weigh my options between the Walnut Creek facility vs. SF. The WC facility has 2 midwives on duty 24/7 and there's a difference between that type of philosophy and SF's which is more of a physician care philosophy. But if I choose SF - I can stay at home for as long as possible before needing to be admitted. I hope and fantasize that my labor will be more endurable snuggled in bed with AG and soaking in a warm tub with warm candles and soft music playing for as long as possible. I'm glad our birth preparation classes start soon - knowing what to expect will help alleviate some anxiety. This train of thought led me down the birthing path what Martini will look like.

So I grabbed a baby picture of AG and tried to remember what I looked like then mentally merged "us" together. It's difficult to project from this excerise, but she could look like AG with almond eyes and darker hair/skin. The last several babies I've seen, the girls have looked a lot like their dad. I have to agree with my parents that AG is prettier than me and I wouldn't be diappointed at all if Martini took after her dad. Those curls are pretty darn cute and I would die for those eyebrows.